No, That’s Not Me

 Astolfo sitting in front of a track sewing machine, next to a clothing rack with a few articles of clothing, in interview format.

Astolfo: So when I was a kid, think 7 to 13, I decided to- I- that’s when I realized that I was not cis, which is weird saying ’cause I’m intersex, but that was not- that, I didn’t feel like I was what I was raised up as- as a boy. But I was afraid, very afraid. So I decided to technically just say “No, that’s not me. I’m going to wear this masculine t-shirt and these- these knee shorts.” And basically it made me sad. It made me feel like I was repressing, which I was, and all clothing- all clothing back then felt wrong until I found- until I saw a dress, but I didn’t let myself like that.

And then when I was about 14, 15, I said “You know what? Screw it, I’m going to start wearing what I want to wear.” Which involved skirts, I had the very typical trans fem starter pack skirt that goes about to here [gestures to knee] and even though it’s very stereotypical I really like that skirt. I still have it actually, I think I lost it somewhere in my room- in me and my girlfriend’s room. Oh, when I moved, all the clothing that I wear, of the clothing that I brought when I moved, is clothing that affects my identity. That is about my gender, that makes me present myself not as my gender, but as myself.